Thanksgiving buy-in: Host demands $100 admission fee for dinner plate

Family proposes $100 minimum buy-in for Thanksgiving dinner

Families were told they must bring in at least $100 worth of food to participate in the Thanksgiving meal.

OAKLAND - A significant family dispute over the cost of a Thanksgiving potluck has gone viral after a man posted the details on Reddit, leading his immediate family to decide against attending the annual gathering.

Minimum buy-in

The backstory:

The controversy centers on a change in contribution rules for a large family dinner expected to host about 25 people.

As an initial contribution, a host family member spent $300 on the meat for the meal. 

"In the group chat it was decided that my nephew would cook meat since he bought a grill. He also told us that we could bring the sides. He chose to spend $300 on meat," the Reddit post read. "I messaged in the group chat that we would bring mashed potatoes."

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Family members were then told in a group chat that they must bring a minimum of $100 worth of food to contribute to the meal or "help my nephew pay for the meat."

"I'm not totally against the idea of bringing that much food, but just way it was presented and the fact that it wasn't agreed to beforehand made me upset," said the Redditor, who described his family as small, consisting of only himself, his wife, and their six-month-old baby.

The ultimatum

What we know:

When the initial $100 rule caused frustration, the family escalated the demand by offering extreme alternatives to the required food contribution.

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The options presented to family members were to either bring the $100 worth of food or contribute financially toward the host's costs. These options included helping the host pay for the meat or even paying the family water bill.

Dinner declined

What's next:

The Reddit poster ultimately decided that he, his wife, and their baby would not be attending the gathering in protest of the unexpected and rigid financial demands.

‘Math isn’t mathing'

What they're saying:

Redditors weren't shy about sharing their opinions on the viral post.

"This is a potluck not a charity dinner. If your nephew couldn’t afford to buy the meat he shouldn’t have bought it," one person commented.

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"Everyone has to bring at least $100 of food and there's 22 people. This meal is going to have $2200 worth of food? One hell of a feast. You could feed an army on $100 worth of potatoes," another said. 

"The math isn't mathing. $300 divided amongst 20-25 people is not $100 per family," another Redditor noted.

"What's the point? If Thanksgiving is at dad's, it's for 1 day. No way his water bill is going to increase by $600 that one day. It's insane. Next they'll say they have a vending machine for utensils," another chimed in.

"Bring enough food for everyone" is a reasonable request for a potluck-style family dinner. The rest of it is not. Dad should not offer to host if the water bill is a problem. (is everyone taking showers and doing loads of laundry during this one-day visit? Even if they were, $200 is obviously insane). Brother should not offer to bring the meat if the expense is too much. And no one should be "required" to bring or pay anything that wasn't agreed to in advance. Decline the invitation is the only reasonable response really," someone else shared. 

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